On Being A Mother And Other Things

I came across this quote and oh my goodness it really hit home because I find myself picking apart my body all the time. Even though I say I want to model self esteem for my daughter I am not following it because it has become such an ingrained habit to diss my looks. Seriously every single gathering of women I have ever been a part of, whether it be girls night with my besties or just a team meeting at work, there are always comments back and forth from someone about how they hate their body and how they need to improve this and that. It totally makes sense that Maya is going to grow up with the exact same habit if I don't watch it. This quote has reminded me to be mindful of what comes out of my mouth AT ALL TIMES.

When I saw this quote I simultaneously came across this article and wow it also spoke to me. It's so true! Read it. 

Hey guess what? I got back to cardio kickboxing classes today!  For reals it was so great to be back. The workout kicked my arse, it did.  But I didn't care because it was the same when I went back from my pregnancy with Maya - I was weak for a bit but got stronger and faster. I know this time I will be kicking butt again in no time. The best part was being able to do actual jumping jacks and I even managed a few "burpees" (although sad looking ones, but I did it).  When I was pregnant with Nolan I could not do either of these things without modifying them immensely due to my baby belly. And laying on my back, I missed being able to lay on my back. And touching my toes. It's crazy the things you take for granted before you get pregnant and all of a sudden you are unable to do such simple things. So happy to have my body back - lumpy and mushy it is, but not for long people!

Speaking of my body I also went to the mall today and bought the dreaded in-between-clothes - you know the ones that you have to buy because you don't quite fit into your pre-pregnancy clothes yet and your maternity clothes are too big (or just no longer cute without the baby bump).  Last time after having Maya this is something that made me very sad and stressed but this time around I'm like "meh, whatever, I won't be wearing these for long!". And so I only bought one pair of jeans and one shirt and sweater because I am that confident that I won't need to wear them longer than a month. In the meantime I've got lots of hoodies and yoga pants to tie me over when I'm hanging around the house. 

Which brings me to my last note. Yesterday I started a structured meal plan again, a diet if you will, but a laid back one where I don't have to write anything down and just have to stick to certain kinds of foods (mainly whole foods) and avoid large quantities of other foods (junk food, processed stuff and the like). It's pretty much Weight Watchers Core plan from back in the day and it has worked well for me before (when I lost 35 lbs pre-Nolan).  So goodbye chocolate milk and raspberry yogurt muffin from the work cafeteria. I no longer need you as a second breakfast. Goodbye iced cappuccino, your caffeine and sugar will no longer be required to stay awake during the day. Goodbye Ben and Jerry's ice cream. You have brought me lots of pleasure but there's just no room for you in my pre-pregnancy jeans. Goodbye using my pregnancy as an excuse to indulge in such things on a regular basis.  It really was fun while it lasted but I knew the day would come - the date I set in my mind the whole nine months that Nolan was growing inside of me..... the day of my six week post-partem check up with the doc. I knew once that was done and over with it was back to the nitty gritty. That was the date I had decided that I would get back to my weight loss goals.  I'm all healed, breastfeeding has been firmly established, and our family is getting back into a new grove. It's go time.