TODAY'S MOTIVATION
Ok so yesterday I googled myself. Come on, you have all done it. Don't say you haven't! I wanted to see what kinds of pictures of me were floating around in cyberspace. I do this once in while because I work in a profession where I don't want clients looking me up and seeing really personal things about where I live, etc. So basically I try to keep my facebook stuff private, avoid anything connecting me to my blog on the search engines - you know, stuff like that. I have no problem sharing my life online, but I try to make it impossible for people to track me down in real life. Anyway, I digress. When I googled myself a few pages came up - a wedding web site I was on, a photography blog, a place I volunteered once. When I was looking at the pictures it showed some of me when I was thinner than I am now, and some when I was a lot bigger than I am now. Then I realized that not only could clients try to find me, but people I went to high school with, or old university room mates, etc.
It's crazy just how vulnerable you can become as soon as someone takes a pictures of you because you never know where that picture is going to end up. They could post it anywhere and if your name is attached to it, people will find it. This whole thing is nothing new, but for someone who is trying hard to get back to a healthy weight it can be a real drag knowing that fat pictures of you are always going to be circulating around. It's not just in cyberspace....they exist in people's wedding photos, yearbooks, vacation scrapbooks - all the things that document your time with these people here on earth. Once a picture is taken of you it is imprinted forever. Why do I bring this up? Because it can be painful to look back on pictures of you when you were real fat because it reminds you that although you had some pretty good memories, they were tainted somewhat by the fact that you didn't look your best (and that you were not a hundred percent happy with yourself in the said photo). But I'm still young. One day hopefully I will look back at this time and feel like I have lived so much since this time, and that this was only a small part of my journey. It would be nice when I'm 50 years old to look back at pictures of me now and not cringe. Pictures play a big role in things that motivate me because they keep me accountable. Know what I mean?
RANT OR RAVE
This time of year always kind of sucks for me food-wise because there starts to be slim pickins' in the produce section and there isn't really much local produce available. This is when I tend to gravitate to comfort foods like bread, pasta, and the like. I cannot stress enough how much I HATE winter. And where I live, it isn't really even that cold compared to other places. But we still get snow and freezing temperatures and bare trees and all that. I can't wait to hit up Florida for vacay in less than two weeks! On that note, I will be shopping for my new bathing suit this week!
RANDOMS
So we decided to invest in solar panels which we are in the process of installing in our yard. What we thought would only take a few days is stretching out to take a lot longer, but isn't that always the way? I took some pictures of the beginning stages. I'd have to say, although I am excited about getting involved in a green project, I am very sad that the view out my back window is going to be tainted by this structure. It's gonna be over 30 ft long! I'll post pics when it is finished!
